If today is the day

Cancel what you can. Eat something. Drink water. Do not drive if you can avoid it. If a friend has offered to come over, say yes. Do not write the long social-media post tonight. Sleep is medicine; it will not feel like it, but it is.

The five things owners say afterwards

  1. I keep hearing him. Auditory ghosts can last weeks. Not a hallucination — a brain still tuned to a frequency that has gone silent.
  2. Did I do it too soon? Almost no owner asks "too late." You did it at the moment you could bear to.
  3. I feel guilty for feeling relieved. Relief is not betrayal. It is the body acknowledging that a long watch has ended.
  4. Other people don’t get it. Some won’t. Some will surprise you. Spend energy on the ones who do.
  5. I won’t get another. Many do, eventually. Many don’t. Both are correct.

Helplines

  • India · iCall — Mon-Sat 8am-10pm IST. Counsellors trained for grief, including pet loss. +91 9152987821
  • India · Vandrevala Foundation — 24/7, free. 1860 2662 345
  • USA · ASPCA Pet Loss Hotline — Trained grief counsellors. 1-877-474-3310
  • UK · Blue Cross Pet Bereavement — Daily, 8.30am-8.30pm. 0800 096 6606

Things to read

The essay Grief after pet euthanasia — what the textbooks miss covers the first six weeks in more detail. The free Quality-of-Life Decision Pack includes a 30-day journal used by 4,000+ readers.